The Heiress (Burgoyne, 1786)/Act 4, Scene 2

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Lord Gayvile.I am resolved to see Miss Alscrip, no more.

Sir Clement.And I hope you are prepared with arguments to justify the cause of this breach, to me, and to the world.

Lord Gayville.For my reconciliation with you I hope your former partiality will return to my aid; and as for the world I despise it. The mul­titude look at happiness thro' the false glare of ​wealth and pomp: I have discovered it, tho' yet at a distance, thorough the only true medium, that of mutual affection.

Sir Clement.No common place book formed from a whole library of plays and novels could furnish a better sentence. Your folly wou'd shame a school boy—even of the last age—In the present he learns the world with his grammar, and gets a just no­tion of the worthlessness of the other sex before he is of an age to be duped by their attractions.

Lord Gayville.Sir, your prejudices.———

Sir Clement.My prejudices?—will you appeal to Clifford—here he comes—your friend—your

Lord Gayville.And will Clifford, condemn the choice of the heart?

Clifford.Never, my lord, when justly placed—In the case I perceive you are arguing, I am ready to blush for you—nay, don't look grave—I am ac­quainted with your inchantress.

Lord Gayville.You acquainted with her?

Clifford.Yes, and if I don't deceive myself, shall make her break her own spell. I am in corres­pondence with her.

Lord Gayville.You in correspondence with Miss Alton!—when? where? What am I to think of this?

Clifford.My dear Lord, that she is the most errant coquette, the most accomplished jilt, the most ready trafficker of her charms———

Lord Gayville.Phrenzy and profanation—Such dignity of virtue, such chastity of sentiment———

Sir Clement.Ha! ha! ha!

​Clifford.Phrenzy indeed! You have formed a creature of imagination, and like a true Quixote think it real; you have talked to her of dignity, of virtue and chastity, of sentiment, till you have taught her a lure she never dreamt of—Had you treated her at first as I did, she wou'd have put a card into your hand to inform you of her lodg­ing.

Lord Gayville.Clifford, what has betray'd you into calumny so unwarrantable and despicable?

Sir Clement.Come, Gayville, I'll be plain with you, you have sillily let the girl raise her price upon you—but if nothing else will satisfy you, e'en pay it, and have done with her.

Lord Gayville.Sir, her price is an unadulte­rated heart: I am afraid we cannot pay it betwixt us.

Chignon.Alerte, Monsieure, I repete your word—Madamoiselle Alton, be all your own.

Sir Clement.Come, Clifford, the contents: his Lordship braves the trial.

Lord Gayville.What is this mighty scheme? and what is that paper to discover?

Clifford. (breaking open the letter)Your Lord­ship shall be informed word for word. (Upon first sight of the contents he shews the utmost emotion) Amazement! do I dream! can it be? who wrote this letter?

Sir Clement.Oh! speak out Monsieur, we are all friends.

Chignon.De true Madamoiselle Alton to whom you charge me to give your letter—she open it—she turn pale—den red—den confuse—den kisse your name—den write, and bid me fly.

​Lord Gayville.Confusion, on confusion, what does all this mean? explain.

Clifford.You must pardon me, I am discon­serted—confounded—thunder-struck—This letter is indeed of a different nature, from that I ex­pected—I am more interested in Miss Alton's fate, than your Lordship—my perplexity is not to be endur'd; friend, come with me instantly. [Exeunt Clifford and Chignon.

Lord Gayville.Mystery, and torture! what am I to collect from this? He interested in the fate of Miss Alton? he her former acquaintance?

Sir Clement.Why not—and her dupe also?

Servant.Is Mr. Clifford gone, Sir?

Lord Gayville. (impatiently)Who wants him?

Servant.A chairman with a letter, he will not deliver to a servant.

Sir Clement.Call the fellow in. [Exit Servant. Who knows but he may help us in our difficulties.

Lord Gayville. (still impatiently)Whom did you bring that letter from?

Chairman.Please your honor, I don't know; passing through the square, a sash flew up, and down came this letter and half a crown upon my head. It could not have fallen better, there's not a fellow in town more expert than I am at private business—So I resolved to deliver it safely—Is your honor's name Clifford?

Lord Gayville.No indeed, friend, I am not so happy a man.

Sir Clement. (aside)That letter must not be lost though. Here, my friend—I'll take charge of ​your letter. (takes the letter) Something for your pains.

Chairman.God bless your honor, and if you want to send an answer, my number is forty seven in Bond-street—your honor, I am known by the name of secret Tom. [Exit.

Lord Gayville.What is the use of this deceit? strong as my suspicion is, a seal must be sacred.

Sir Clement.Our circumstances make an ex­ception to your rule: when there is treason in the state, wax gives way. (takes the letter, opens and reads it.) Faith this is beyond my expectation—tho' the mystery is unfathomable, the aptness of it to my purpose is admirable—Gayville—I wish you joy.

Lord Gayville.Of what?

Sir Clement.Of conviction! if this is not plain! only hear (reads) "since my confused lines of a few minutes past, my perplexities redouble upon my spirits—I am in momentary appre­hension of further insult from the Alscrip family; I am still more anxious to avoid Lord Gayville" (pauses and looks at Lord Gayville:) "do not suspect my sincerity—I have not a thought of him that ought to disturb you."—Here she is Gayville, look at her, through the true medium of mutual affection—"I have not a thought of him that ought to disturb you"—Fly to me, secure me, my dearest Henry.

Lord Gayville.Dearest Henry!

Sir Clement. (reads on)"Dearest Henry—In this call, the danger of your Harriet unites with the impatience of her affection."

Lord Gayville.Hell, and fury! this must be some trick, some forgery (snatches the letter.) No, by all that's perfidious it is that exquisite hand that baffles imitation.

​Sir Clement.All, regular, strict, undeviating modern morals—common property is the first principle of friendship; your horse, your house, your purse, your mistress—nay, your wife wou'd be a better example still of the doctrine of this generous age. Bless fortune, Gayville, that has brought the fidelity of your friend and your girl to the test at the same time.

Lord Gayville.Sir, I am not in a humour for any spleen but my own. What can this mean?—It must have been a secret attachment for years—but then the avowal of a correspondence and the confusion at receiving it—his coldness in traducing her; the passionate interest he express'd in her fate; the conviction of his second letter—It is all delirium. I'll search the matter to the bottom, tho' I go to Clifford's heart for it. (Exit in great anger.)

Sir Clement.I'll after the precious fellow too—He is a rogue above my hopes, and the intricacy of his snares excite my curiosity. [Exit.