The Heiress (Burgoyne, 1786)/Act 2, Scene 2

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SCENE II. An Antichamber.

Alscrip. (without).Dinner not order'd till seven o'clock—Bid the kitchen maid get me some eggs and bacon.—Plague, what with the time of dining and the French cookery, I am in the land of star­vation, with half St. James's-Market upon my weekly bills.

Enter (while speaking the last sentence.)

What a change have I made to please my un­pleaseable daughter? Instead of my regular meal at Furnival's-Inn, here am I transported to Berk­ley-Square, to fast at Alscrip House till my fine company come from their morning ride, two hours after dark—Nay its worse, if I am carried among my great neighbours in Miss Alscrip's suite, as she calls it. My Lady looks over me; my Lord walks over me; and sets me in a little tottering cane chair, at the cold corner of the table—Tho' I have a mortgage upon the house and furniture, and ​arrears due of the whole interest. It's a pleasure tho' to be well dressed. My daughter maintains all fashions are founded in sense—Icod the tight­ness of my wig, and the stiffness of my cape, give me the sense of the pillory—Plaguy scanty about the hips too—And the breast something of a merry thought reversed—But there is some sense in that, for if one sex pares away in proportion where the other swells, we shall take up no more room in the world than we did before.

Enter a Servant.

Servant.Sir, Miss Alscrip wishes to see you. She is at her toilet.

Alscrip.Who is with her?

Servant.Only Mrs. Blandish, Sir.

Alscrip.She must content herself with that com­pany 'till I have had my whet—order up the eggs and bacon. [Exit.

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