Page:Zora Neale Hurston - Woofing.pdf/6

Man, come on back here and move, or else own up to de folks yo' can't push no checkers wid me.

(He sits and begins to lay out moves with his fingers and scratch his head. Enter another MAN and stands akimbo looking over Cliff's shoulder)

(Looking up)

Don't stand over me lak dat, ugly as yo' is.

You ain't nobody's pretty baby yo'self!

Dat's all right, I ain't as ugly as yo' - youse ugly enough to git behind a Simpoon weed and hatch monkies.

And youse ugly enough to git behind a tombstone and hatch hants.

Youse so ugly dey have to cover yo' face up at night so sleep can slip up on yo'.

You look like ten cents worth of Have-Mercy. Yo' face look lak ole Uncle Jump-off. Yo' mouth look lak a bunch of ruffles.

Yeah, but yo' done passed me. Yo' so ugly till they could throw yo' in de Mississippi River and skim ugly for six months.

Look here, Cliff, don't yo' personate me! Counting from de little finger back to de thumb - yo' start anythin', I got yo' some.

Go head and grab me buddie, but if yo' don't know how to turn me loose too, don't bring de mess up! If yo' hit me, I may not beat you, but yo'll be so dirty when St. Peter git yo' dat he can't use yo'.

Don't call me buddy. Yo' buddy is huntin' coconuts. Don't yo' try to throw me for a nap. Do. I'll kill yo' so stiff dead they'll have to push yo' down. Yo' gointer to make me do some double cussin' on you.

(He picks up a heavy stick and walks back towards Cliff)