Page:The Scourge - Volume 5.djvu/28
16 Scotch honest]/.
times disputed the ascendancy with his ruling principle, Avarice! Sandy was of an amorous complexion; and Sandy loved wine! But the indulgence of these propensities was expensive; and 500/. per annum afforded but a remote prospect of even a moderate accumulation, with the drawback of their intermediate gratification!
This reflection naturally suggested itself to Sandy; and while in moody contemplation of his actual situation and prospects — Sartje, one of the female natives of the country, in which he then sojourned, casually crossed his view; and engendered in his fertile brain, an idea at which he eagerly grasped; and he soon determined to elicit from his embryo project, the prolific seeds of a golden harvest! He knew by experience the extreme credulity and gullibility of John Bull! He marked the wonderful deformity and unnatural conformation of Sartje ! The English are fond of monsters; and here was one to gratify their taste to the utmost! Like a second Jason, Sandy embarked with his golden fleece, or at least with this monstrous but infallible succedaneum, " to fleece blockheads of their gold!. " Sandy landed safely in South Britain with his Hottentot Fenml ! !
Sandy was presently offered a new appointment, inspector of hospitals/ But Sandy understood arithmetic! Thirty shillings per diem in the sphere of a gentleman, were not to be balanced with fifteen pounds per diem, obtained by merely the sacrifice of the little previous pretension which Sandy possessed to that character, and which consisted exclusively in his commission and its appendages! The latter sum, Sandy now averages periderm, in the honourable capacity of" itinerant exhibitor of his Hottentot Venus!" Yet Sandy retains half pay, as a surgeon in his Majesty's army!
Sandy, however, whatever opinion men of principles and honour may be induced to build upon these facts, has actually not yet entirely lost all sense of shame! He does not wish his present self to be identified with his former self i either in person, or in name! In the latter,