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"But, my dear madam, I am not happy. I used to be happy certainly; but ever since I received that note I have felt a certain sort of something like a wish to be married. Now, I do not belong to the Church of Rome—I belong to the Church of England; and therefore I do not see why I should not enter into the marriage state. Do you see any just cause or impediment?"

"Oh, dear no: none whatever."

"Do you see why I should not marry, when marriage presents a bright prospect of happiness?"

"No: I really do not."

"Then I want your advice."

"But I have had no experience in these matters."

"So much the better: I'd rather, my dear madam, have your advice—upon this point especially—than that of any other creature breathing. Now, suppose that I were in love—that is to say, suppose that I had so firm—so ardent an affection for a lady, that I imagined marriage to be absolutely essential to my happiness: suppose this, I merely say suppose it, and then tell me what you'd advise me to do?"

"Really," replied Aunt Eleanor, smiling, "I'm so perfectly unacquainted with affairs of this character, that I feel quite incompetent to offer advice."

"But how, in this case, do you think I ought to act?"

"Well, really—I scarcely know: but I should think that if you are in the position you describe, you ought at once to propose to the lady."

"Very good. But how is it to be done?"

"I cannot give you any information upon that point."

"Well, but how do you imagine it ought to be done?"

"Upon my word, I cannot say. I have had so little experience in these affairs, that it may almost be said that I am ignorant of them."

"But you have had offers?"

"Oh, yes! I have had many offers, certainly."

"Will you do me the favour to explain to me how they were made?"

"My dear sir—really—I scarcely know how it is possible for me to do so."

"If you would, you would oblige me. I should then know exactly how to manage it myself."

"Well: but upon my word, the idea of your asking me for information on the subject appears so excessively odd."

"My dear madam, whom should I ask for information but one is able to give it? I pledge you my honour, I never proposed to a lady in my life; I cannot, therefore, be expected to know anything about the matter: whereas, you having had offers made you, know well how the business is done."

"I really do not pretend to know anything about it."

"I am aware that you do not pretend to know; and this absence of all pretension, in my judgment, constitutes one of your most admirable characteristics, but you nevertheless do know all about it; do you not?"

"Upon my word—it seems so strange that I should be thus applied to."