Page:Punch Vol 148.djvu/608
House of Commons, Wednesday.—In a speech occupying nearly two hours' delivery, unusual length in active war time, the Minister of Munitions explained his scheme of obtaining sufficient supply at earliest possible moment. Fairly full House recognised scope of plan and systematised vigour with which it is already set afoot. Only criticism offered is that it comes into existence ten months too late.
This, as Sark says, is the easiest form of criticism, pleasing to the critic as implying that had he been in charge of the business such prompt commencement would have been achieved.
Jack Pease, free from trammels of office and the pledge of secrecy that seals lips of Cabinet Ministers, made clean breast of the matter. Whilst benevolently "begging the House not to regard the new departure as reflection on the sins of the Secretary for War or the omissions of the late Government," he admitted that at beginning of the War "we had no idea" of what would be wanted in the way of munitions.
Arthur Markham, l'enfant terrible of debate, noting this admission, observed that there were a good many lamp-posts in Whitehall. Who deserved to be hanged on them he was not prepared to say. Incidentally, with an eye obviously fixed on a particular lamp-post, he asserted that "the cardinal mistake that Lord Kitchener made was that of concentrating in his own hands the work of the War Office, down to the smallest details."
Captain Guest, home on brief leave from the Front, his khaki uniform looking uncommonly fresh considering ten months' service, made simple eloquent appeal for more munitions.
Business done.—Lloyd George brought in Bill providing for increased supply of munitions. The Central European Powers are, he said, turning out 250,000 shells a day. "If we are in earnest," he added, amid loud cheers, "we can surpass that enormous production."
Thursday.—Sitting chiefly engaged in discussing Local Government Vote. Walter Long in moving it mentioned that twenty-nine years have elapsed since he first went to the Board. Returning to his early love finds her much changed.
In course of conversation, Hayes Fisher quite incidentally mentioned that next week a Bill will be introduced authorising a system of National Registration. Scanty audience greeted momentous statement with feeble cheer.
Business done.—Committee of Supply.
Persevering Volunteer (wrestling with bugle in remote spot). "Ah-h-h-h—got it at last!"
"The Government was investigating the cause of the great increase in the export of yarns to neutrals."—Egyptian Gazette.
"Wolff's Bureau," beware!
MY LADY'S GARDEN.
Was fair of old to see:
Here foxgloves grew of every hue,
The sweet, though lanky, pea,
The mignonette and pansy—
All blooms that smile or smell
With many a name, I own with shame,
I've never learned to spell.
In those dear days gone by;
It helped me drown the thought of town
And dull old care defy;
Amid its Summer fragrance
I'd sit out eve until
All earth was dumb save for the hum
From Philomela's bill.
Exhales an air of gloom,
A sombre green pervades the scene
Where blushed full many a bloom;
For oh! this former pleasaunce
On which I set such store
Is crammed with "veg." from edge to edge
To help her through the War.
"Wanted, a competent Madrasi Ayah to take charge of a baby of 10 months, who can speak English and Hindustani."
The Statesman.
This precocious infant should require some looking after.