Page:Punch Vol 148.djvu/529
A CIVILIAN GUIDE TO THE ARMY.
Why not use the moustache to indicate military rank?
A SEA-CHANGE OF MIND.
Twickenham, May 3rd.
My dear Tanker,—It is all right. Batson says the fishing is excellent, and the house is at my disposal; the caretaker will look after us and the bailiff will show us the ropes. I can get away for a fortnight, and if you can travel by the Irish Mail Boat on the 20th I will complete arrangements.
Ever yours, Brandon Quinn.
Hampstead, May 4th.
My dear Quinn,—Right you are. I'm your man for the 20th. I feel sorry for your Batson's salmon already. How big are they, and are they fat ones and fairly tame? What is their favourite fly, and do they like a single or a double hook best? or shall I bring prawns? and what about waders and a harpoon?
Ever yours, P. S. Tanker.
Twickenham, May 5th.
My dear Tanker,—Batson says it's all bank fishing, and prawns are no use. Fly and spinners, which can be got locally, are what are wanted.
Yours ever, Brandon Quinn.
P.S.—What do you think about this submarine scare?
Twickenham, May 9th.
Dear Tanker,—You did not answer my question about the submarines. There is no doubt that there are lots about, and they mean mischief. I feel that to risk our lives in the pursuit of pleasure is, perhaps, a little uncalled-for just now. Will you let me know what you think?
Ever yours, Brandon Quinn.
Hampstead, May 10th.
My Dear Quinn,—The line I take is that no German, in or out of a submarine, is going to interfere with any holiday of mine. It would be an admission of defeat. Besides the risk is practically nil.
Yours, P. S. Tanker.
Twickenham, May 11th.
Dear Tanker,—I quite agree that this country ought not to admit that the German blockade is successful, but we are too old to fight, and I do not see what benefit it would be to the country if we were blown up. Besides, I have the office to think of, and the Lawn Tennis Club, of which I am Secretary and Treasurer. Who could take my place? Then again, the risk is a real one. The news of the past few days leaves no doubt on that point. It seems to me that we ought seriously to consider whether it is right for us to go.
Yours, Brandon Quinn.
Twickenham, May 11th.
Dear Tanker,—Since writing this morning I have seen a lady who came from Ireland two days ago. She says