Page:Punch Vol 148.djvu/427

House of Commons, Tuesday, 20th April.—One slightly compensatory result of devastating War is reduction of number of Questions addressed to Ministers. Been known to stop short of the round dozen. Instinctively felt that at period of national crisis this cheapest method of self-advertisement is bad form. To-day—unaccountably except on ground that long week-end provides mischief for idle hands to do—flood set in with the old rush.

"Here is an extra Monday thrown into week-end," says honourable Member in privacy of his study. "Let us draft a few questions addressed to Edward Grey, Lloyd George, Tennant or all three. They've nothing particular to do and are well paid for doing it. We'll get our name into the Parliamentary Report and our constituents will see we're on the spot."

Accordingly Paper distributed this morning crowded with 157 questions, forty of them standing in five names that are familiar in this connection. Within limit of Question hour (which by Westminster clock runs only for three-quarters) 112 were put and answered. Replies to the rest will be printed and circulated with votes in the morning. That a game not worth the candle consumed in drafting them. You may circulate replies just as you may take a horse to the pond. But you can't make the public read them, and no one will know how active and intelligent are the authors of these forty-five belated queries.

No other business being on hand, way made for Member for Houghton-le-Spring—quite a total-abstainer touch about name of constituency—to move his Resolution prohibiting, during continuance of War, sale of alcoholic liquors in refreshment rooms and bars of House. His Majesty's personal example specially cited in support of proposal.

Quickly made apparent that House was sharply divided, with preponderance of opposition. Collins, Kt., presenting himself to favourable consideration of House as a "total abstainer by birth," plumped for Resolution, as did By-Your-Leif Jones and other teetotalers, whether by birth or adoption. On the contrary (his favourite attitude) Arthur Markham, habituated to call a spade a spade, in extreme cases a pickaxe, denounced the motion as "pure cant."

Bonar Law put that view of it in another form. Members would support the Resolution, and if sale of liquor within precincts of the House were prohibited they would, he said, go off to their homes or their clubs and take their accustomed drink.

"In a time of stress like that at present laid upon the country," he insisted, "we should have less rather than more of the make-believe that is part of the daily life of all politicians."

As for Mark Lockwood, Chairman of the Kitchen Committee, who has hauled down from his buttonhole the carnation that had then had acquired the status of a parliamentary institution, he was so agitated that he stumbled upon a bull whose originality, breed and excellence made the few Irish Members present green with envy.

"The profits of the Kitchen Department," Mark wailed, "are growing less and less every day. If this resolution is passed it will reduce what is left, which is nil, by 50 per cent."

In face of this appalling menace, Resolution was shunted by adjournment of the debate sine die.

Business done.—None. House adjourned at 5 o'clock.

Wednesday.—Lloyd George is indebted to Mr. Hewins for opportunity of making the most important statement with respect to affairs at the Front heard in the Commons this year. Member for Hereford submitted Resolution declaring urgent necessity of enlisting under unified administration resources of all firms capable of producing munitions of war. Pointing out that motion was tantamount to a vote of censure, since it implied that the Government were not doing their duty and that the House ought therefore to pass a resolution calling their attention to it, Chancellor said he could not consent to its adoption. At the same time he cordially approved its suggestion, and proceeded to show in detail that it had long been embodied in policy and action of the Government.

Lifting the veil behind which for strategic purposes the War Office works, in a few sentences he brought home to least imaginative mind stupendous character of our operations. The 'contemptible little army" at which eight months ago the Kaiser sneered has grown till there are now in the field six times as many men as formed the original Expeditionary Force, all fully equipped and supplied with adequate ammunition. Wherever German shot or shell has made a vacancy in the trenches or in the field, another British soldier has stepped in to fill it.

As to ammunition the War Office has been faced by unexpected increase in expenditure. Taking the figure 20 as representing output last September, Chancellor showed that it has increased by leaps and bounds till in March it reached 388. He confidently anticipates that this month the ratio will proportionately advance. During the few days' fighting round Neuve Chapelle almost as much ammunition was expended by our artillery as was fired during the whole of the two-and-three-quarter years of the Boer War. And not only were our own demands met, but we could also help to supply the need of our allies.

Curiously small audience for momentous statement. Effect produced