Page:Punch Vol 148.djvu/307

"Believe me," he said, "no one could more sincerely regret the fact than I do. But there has obviously been some mistake."

"Mistake? I don't understand you.'

"What I mean is," said Gerald, "all this accident business. Of course, as a private individual I should at any time be delighted to rescue you from anything in reason. But as a hero, accidents are (if you will forgive me) not in my line."

"Your line?" cried the astonished girl.

"Light comedy," he explained, "with sparkling dialogue, and perhaps a touch of refined farce. At the present moment I am travelling into the country to meet an unknown heiress whom my late uncle's will constrains me to marry. So naturally when I saw you come in———"

"I see," said the girl. "It was an error," she added magnanimously, "that any hero might excusably make."

She looked so attractive in her own rather vague line-and-wash style as she said it that Gerald was moved to continue―

"I only wish it had been true."

The girl suddenly laughed, perhaps to cover her slight confusion.

"I was thinking," she explained, that, as two short stories are apparently laid in the same train and have got mixed, in some other compartment there is probably a strong silent hero who specializes in rescues trying to make head or tail of your bright comedy heiress."

"Suppose," suggested Gerald suddenly, "that we leave them at it."

"How do you mean?"

"There's a station in five minutes. Let us slip out thore, and leave them to explain matters to each other after the smash. That ending would be at least as satisfactory as the usual kind."

The train was already slowing down. "Will you?" he asked.

Still, though the paragraphs were running out, the girl hesitated. Then at last she turned to him with that wonderful smile of hers that has been the grave of so many artistic reputations.

"Yes," she said. She held out her arms.

"My mistake!" said Gerald apologetically; "I had nearly forgotten that little formality."

He kissed her.

Voice from the far-end of hut (to Sergeant, who is retiring after expressing himself strongly on the question of "lights out"). "Sergeant! Sergeant! You haven't kissed me good-night!"

{{blockquote| "The advance of the Allied Fleet up the Dardanelles is causing the heads of the Balkan States to stroke their chins thoughtfully."

The Hon. Secretary of the Committee for the Relief of Belgian Soldiers writes to the Editor of Punch:―"M. Emile Vandervelde, Minister of State, would be very grateful if you would again help him, as the need of the Belgian Soldiers is very great, and as the earlier appeal which you were good enough to publish was very successful." Mr. Punch begs his kind readers to send further assistance to King Albert's gallant Army, addressing their gifts to M. Emile Vandervelde, Victoria Hotel, Northumberland Avenue, W.C.

"He is again near the scene of his defeat at the said Przanyss."―The Observer.

This is mere swank. Mr. Garvin has only written it; he never said it.

"The second of the Saturday afternoon lectures at Trinity College will take place to-morrow afternoon at half past three in the Convocation Hall, when Dr. Alexander Fraser will lecture on 'The Kiltie Church in Scotland and Its Missionary Work.'"

Toronto Daily News.

Is this the Church more widely known as the "Wee Frees," many members of which are doing excellent missionary work in Flanders in counteracting Kultur?