Page:Punch Vol 148.djvu/295

Child (to gardener in Kensington Gardens, mending the cotton cross-threads over the crocus blooms). "Would you please tell me―are those threads to keep the Zeppelins off?"

["The day when news was the thing seems to be passing; papers now vie one with the other with free insurance and advertisement schemes; thousand-pound prizes for photography and vegetables... almost everything except the news."

By its existing insurance scheme, its war-poetry contest, and its generously endowed laundry competition, The Daily Boom already shows its solicitude for life and limb and its interest in the æsthetic and industrial pursuits of the people. By way of a change it launches to-day a mammoth prize offer of immense moral significance.

The Daily Boom has long felt that it might perhaps take some part in the encouragement of moral effort among all classes, irrespective of creed, party, position, taste or any other distinction. The management has therefore promulgated this new and amazing competition.

Every person anxious to add to his finances by improving his character should enter to-day, his first step being to hand a written order to his usual newsagent for the regular delivery of The Daily Boom at his house.

A sum of £50,000 (Fifty Thousand Pounds) has been set aside by The Daily Boom, from which substantial money prizes will be distributed among certified regular readers for:―

(1) The finest personal moral deed of the week.

(2) The noblest personal moral achievement of the (calendar) month.

(3) The most glorious personal moral triumph of the half-year ending on Michaelmas Day.

This is the most colossal inducement to the formation of noble character that the world has ever known.

In this competition the Editor's decision is final, whatever it may be in regard to political programmes and other matters.

Whether it be the servant-girl who tells of her free and uninvited confession to breaking the best teapot, or the clergyman who, under the stimulus of our offer, preaches his own sermon after all, and tells us the story of just what happens, all should compete.

Keep that five and four noughts in mind, and go out and do something noble so that you may become a competitor to-day. As you go do not forget to leave a written order with your newsagent; otherwise your efforts will be wasted.

Rewards will also be given to the street newsvendors who supply the lucky prize-winners. Each will receive one clean collar and a packet of voice jujubes per week for life.

Enter now (not forgetting that written order) and do your country good.

Extract from sailor's letter to his wife (fact):—

"Dear Jane,―I am sending you a postal order for 10s., which I hope you may get―but you may not―as this letter has to pass the Censor."

"A look-out must always be kept by the men in the trenches. Even while the photographer was busy one kept observation."

Daily Sketch.

After all, War is War―even in face of the Kodak's undeniable claims.