Page:Confessions of a wife (IA confessionsofwif00adamiala).pdf/44

This page has been proofread, but needs to be validated.
32
CONFESSIONS OF A WIFE

of course, one of the good-looking gods), but he has the exasperating sensitiveness of a modern And then, he has the terrible persistence of a savage. I think he would have been capable of dashing whole tribes to war for a woman, and carrying her off on his shoulder, bound hand and foot, to his own country, and whether she loved him or hated him would n't have mattered so much—he would have got the woman. It must be very uncomfortable to be born with such a frightful will.

But I do not love him. I have told him that I do not love him. I have told him till I should think he would be ashamed to hear it again. But it seems only to make him worse and worse. He has a kind of sublimated insolence such as I never met in any other person, and when I scorn him for it, I find that I admire him for it—which is despicable in me, of course, and I know it perfectly.

He had the arrogance to tell me to-day in so many words that I did n't understand myself. He said—but I will not write what he said. The Accepted Manuscript rejects the quotation.—Oh, if I could talk with Ina! My poor Ina!—If I could only put my head on my mother's lap a minute! It seems to me a lonely girl is the loneliest being in all the world.