Fugitive Poetry. 1600–1878/A Husband's Dream
A Husband's Dream.
I dreamt one night, not many months ago,
A fairy episode of social life;
Perhaps 'twas through pork chops—I hardly know—
Perhaps it was the scolding of my wife!
Whatever cause, 'tis useless now to show,
I needn't mention such domestic strife;
But leave it doubtful 'twixt the chops and woman:
They both are pills—medicinal and common.
A fairy episode of social life;
Perhaps 'twas through pork chops—I hardly know—
Perhaps it was the scolding of my wife!
Whatever cause, 'tis useless now to show,
I needn't mention such domestic strife;
But leave it doubtful 'twixt the chops and woman:
They both are pills—medicinal and common.
Not that I mean against the sex to rail;
Their tongues and tempers are what Nature gave;
And, were I so inclined, my words would fail:
Last month I laid my Julia in the grave!
Well might I mourn—her sad release bewail;
But, in your presence, I'll my sorrows save:
Simply remarking, that my absent treasure
Had such a tongue!—I never knew its measure.
Their tongues and tempers are what Nature gave;
And, were I so inclined, my words would fail:
Last month I laid my Julia in the grave!
Well might I mourn—her sad release bewail;
But, in your presence, I'll my sorrows save:
Simply remarking, that my absent treasure
Had such a tongue!—I never knew its measure.
How happy he—how well may he rejoice—
Who, having loved, and been "beloved again,"
Catches a fairy, whose ecstatic voice
Governs its music in the social strain.
I had, alas! the object of my choice,
I loved, and doubtless, was beloved again;
Oh! when I think upon my Julia's charms,
The wish will rise—"Come, tongueless, to my arms!"
Who, having loved, and been "beloved again,"
Catches a fairy, whose ecstatic voice
Governs its music in the social strain.
I had, alas! the object of my choice,
I loved, and doubtless, was beloved again;
Oh! when I think upon my Julia's charms,
The wish will rise—"Come, tongueless, to my arms!"
But to the dream—the mist, in which I saw
A land Elysian, boasting nought of kings;
Where malice never came—where common law
And common plunder were uncommon things;
Where labour fed its children; where I saw
A group of cherubs, on Empyrean wings,
Chanting and carolling in mirth and jollity,
All to the tune and measure of Equality!
A land Elysian, boasting nought of kings;
Where malice never came—where common law
And common plunder were uncommon things;
Where labour fed its children; where I saw
A group of cherubs, on Empyrean wings,
Chanting and carolling in mirth and jollity,
All to the tune and measure of Equality!
Another group descending from the skies,
Boasted the glories of primeval state,
And singing to the tune of "Fraternise
Dubbed every man the equal of his mate;
Which plainly heralds to perception's eyes
That such an age will come—despite of fate,
When dustmen, gents, and grandees shall take arms,
And ringed exquisites wring the chummy's palms.
Boasted the glories of primeval state,
And singing to the tune of "Fraternise
Dubbed every man the equal of his mate;
Which plainly heralds to perception's eyes
That such an age will come—despite of fate,
When dustmen, gents, and grandees shall take arms,
And ringed exquisites wring the chummy's palms.
How rich the sight! to see the scented beau
Press with delight the milkmaid's brawny waist!
Or trip it gaily on the nimble toe,
With some fair dame who Billingsgate has graced!
Striving by practice to assert and show
There's not the least Equality in taste,
And only hoping that the next pas deux
May bring some unbleached goddess of the flue.
Press with delight the milkmaid's brawny waist!
Or trip it gaily on the nimble toe,
With some fair dame who Billingsgate has graced!
Striving by practice to assert and show
There's not the least Equality in taste,
And only hoping that the next pas deux
May bring some unbleached goddess of the flue.
I thought, that is, I dreamt—and dreams are thought—
That Liberty was fruitful of herself,
And shook her cap, and laughed, and joked in sport,
Like a young widow, or a jovial elf;
For widows are but courteous to be caught;
Although I say this, 'tis but to myself,
While many fancy that the sombre cap
Is but the widow's matrimonial trap!
That Liberty was fruitful of herself,
And shook her cap, and laughed, and joked in sport,
Like a young widow, or a jovial elf;
For widows are but courteous to be caught;
Although I say this, 'tis but to myself,
While many fancy that the sombre cap
Is but the widow's matrimonial trap!
And other joys I saw, and partly shared—
The fair domain was rich in verdant life,
And not a citizen who thought or cared
About the shrill falsetto of his wife.
But those who happily, or sadly, paired,
Need not, like uncouth doves, engender strife;
The law, with wisdom, gave a quick divorce,
And ladies all grew amiable—of course!
The fair domain was rich in verdant life,
And not a citizen who thought or cared
About the shrill falsetto of his wife.
But those who happily, or sadly, paired,
Need not, like uncouth doves, engender strife;
The law, with wisdom, gave a quick divorce,
And ladies all grew amiable—of course!
Oh! lovely sex! how happy were your fate,
If such a law were forcible but now!
Ye who are left until the day be late,
To bind the virgin's wreath upon your brow!
Or, while your beauty fades, supinely wait
Till some old Benedict presumes to bow;
Then take the dotard, and become a nurse,
"For better," if he's rich, if not, "for worse!"
If such a law were forcible but now!
Ye who are left until the day be late,
To bind the virgin's wreath upon your brow!
Or, while your beauty fades, supinely wait
Till some old Benedict presumes to bow;
Then take the dotard, and become a nurse,
"For better," if he's rich, if not, "for worse!"
However, while I lay enwrapped in sleep,
Viewing these glories of Elysian plains,
And taking at futurity a peep,
Methought some monster wreathed me in his chains!
I heaved a sigh, most sadly, darkly, deep,
To think me disenchanted by his pains;
I turned aside—once more I closed my eyes—
And tried again with dreams to fraternise!
Viewing these glories of Elysian plains,
And taking at futurity a peep,
Methought some monster wreathed me in his chains!
I heaved a sigh, most sadly, darkly, deep,
To think me disenchanted by his pains;
I turned aside—once more I closed my eyes—
And tried again with dreams to fraternise!
When suddenly the monster—as I thought—
Again disturbed me by a fearful shake;
I saw its head—I heard its voice distraught;
I felt myself awakened and awake.
I gazed with awe—my eyes the monster sought—
When thus what seemed its form, arose and spake:—
"You nuisance! Mr. B.—no peace in life,
What with your dreams and schemes!"—It was my Wife!
Again disturbed me by a fearful shake;
I saw its head—I heard its voice distraught;
I felt myself awakened and awake.
I gazed with awe—my eyes the monster sought—
When thus what seemed its form, arose and spake:—
"You nuisance! Mr. B.—no peace in life,
What with your dreams and schemes!"—It was my Wife!