Adam the Creator/Scene 6
VI
[The first gleam of dawn before sunrise.
Alter Ego (enters from the left with a suitcase in his hand):
No one’s seen me. (He looks about him.) I haven’t been here now for so many years———
Adam (enters from the right with a suitcase in his hand):
So I’m back here again. The world is asleep still. Only the Creator is awake———
Alter Ego:
Hullo, is someone there?
Adam:
Halt! Who goes there?
Alter Ego:
Surely it isn’t you, Adam?
[He hides his suitcase behind his back.
Adam:
Alter Ego! What are you doing here so early?
[He also hides his suitcase.
Alter Ego:
Oh, nothing in particular. Just to get a breath of air. And you?
Adam:
I’m sleeping badly. And so I just came out for a stroll. (Pause.) Are you going home already?
Alter Ego (sitting down on his suitcase):
Why no. The air’s so nice and fresh here——— (Pause.)
Adam (also sitting down on his suitcase):
I came here to . . . that is to say . . . to be alone. (He sighs.)
Alter Ego (moving his seat a little farther off):
I won’t disturb you. (Pause.) Adam, are you worrying about anything?
Adam:
Why no. Everything’s in order. . . . (He sighs deeply.) You heard, didn’t you, that I lost Lilith?
Alter Ego:
Yes, I heard about it. My heartfelt sympathy, Adam. What was the matter with her?
Adam:
Nothing, really. She wanted to get thinner. . . . She always would have it that I created her too fat. Now tell me, was she fat or not?
Alter Ego:
Not at all too fat. Quite the contrary.
Adam:
There, you see. And she wouldn’t listen to reason. She got thinner and thinner, till one day she . . . went out.
Alter Ego (sighing):
People are eternally dissatisfied. My wife . . . has gone, too.
Adam:
She died?
Alter Ego:
No; she’s still living. (Pause.)
Adam:
You know it may be our fate. Every creator must ultimately be all alone.
Alter Ego:
That is so, Adam—all alone. It’s an ungrateful calling.
Adam:
You’re right—men are ungrateful.
Alter Ego:
And fickle. First they like one thing, and then they like just the opposite———
Adam (draws his seat nearer):
And you can never satisfy them all. That’s the worst of it. However, I can’t complain———
Alter Ego:
Neither can I, Adam; on the contrary.
Adam:
I’m immensely popular with my people. You simply wouldn’t believe it: they’d go through the fire and water for me. But, of course, you know that; they’ve fought with your nation so often . . . and so valiantly.
Alter Ego:
Of course, you know, we won last time.
Adam:
It’s all the same. One time it’s us and another time it’s you. It’s all one, really. In the end it’s just as if no one had won and no one had lost; the only thing clear is that the people were fighting about something or other.
Alter Ego:
And always for something great, for their honour, their faith, for you, for their country . . . .
Adam:
They’re fighting about it and so it seems great to them. That’s how it is, Alter Ego; and that’s why I didn’t oppose them when they started blowing their war-trumpets.
Alter Ego:
Oh, those were great days!
Adam (sighing):
The good old days! But what can one do? The world must evolve gradually. If they want something else now, well and good. That’s the logic of history.
Alter Ego:
You know, it’s really an advance: first our people fight and then they want to fraternize. Only why the devil do they go and do it behind our backs?
Adam:
That’s just it. As if we should stand in their way. Why, it’s our own old idea—to unite! Do you remember? It was just here———
Alter Ego:
How could I forget, my good Adam?
Adam:
And now they’ve come round to that themselves and they want to carry it out like a revolution! By the way, I’ve heard that they want to . . . er . . . depose you, as it were.
Alter Ego: Well, I don’t know whether you can have been rightly informed. I heard that it was you who were in question.
Adam: That is an error. I’ve kept-in the background for a long time now . . . of my own free will, of course. As their creator, you know, I don’t stand in their way at all.
Alter Ego:
Just like me. And then it’s a matter of principle with me. Even if they begged me to stay, I should say: No. Govern yourselves. I have finished my part of the work.
Adam:
Quite right. But I’m only afraid they may break away from all authority when we are not there any more. Something ought to remain.
Alter Ego:
That’s true. Something to keep them in check.
Adam:
Something for them to honour.
Alter Ego:
Don’t you want to speak to them when they come?
Adam:
No; I want to appear before them.
Alter Ego:
As a candidate for election?
Adam:
No; just as Creator. Here in this cave, on the holy earth of creation.
Alter Ego:
If you want to know, I was preparing to do just the same thing. I’ve got it with me.
Adam:
A speech?
Alter Ego:
No, but a costume. A sort of fancy dress, you know. So as to come before them in the guise of a Creator. I’ve never worn it yet.
Adam:
And what sort of material have you chosen?
Alter Ego:
Blue silk. It’s simple and dignified. Just here and there a few silver stars. . . . And what’s yours?
Adam:
Red brocade. Crimson and gold; it has a ceremonial touch. And then, they are the colours of life.
Alter Ego:
That’s not bad. Blue and silver makes a rather sombre effect perhaps.
Adam:
Yes, but you know, it’s nice and supernatural. You’ll appear to them first, won’t you?
Alter Ego:
I don’t know. I’d rather wait———
Adam:
Look here, we might appear to them together. As united creators to a united world!
Alter Ego:
Holding each other by the hand.
Adam:
And I’ll say: Peace be with you.
Alter Ego:
And I’ll say: We bring you eternal peace.
Adam:
This is the last act of creation. Let the world be united!
Alter Ego:
Let the work of creation be complete. Humanity is redeemed.
Adam:
Amen! Alter Ego, this will be simply magnificent. I think they could—they really ought—to build a shrine here then.
Alter Ego:
The Shrine of Creation.
Adam:
And we could live the rest of our lives there in peace———
Alter Ego:
—and sometimes we would appear to them———
Adam:
—but only in the distance, you know. Near to it isn’t so; I don’t quite know how to say it.
Alter Ego:
Yes. The farther we are from them the greater we shall appear.
Adam:
And this spot must be held sacred and inviolate. Only certain people specially initiated must be allowed to approach here———
Alter Ego:
—and for certain ceremonies.
Adam:
Of course, I don’t mean by that that there should be priests; I don’t care for ecclesiastics.
Alter Ego:
Nor do I; but it will be something rather similar.
Adam:
And we shall be as it were higher, supernatural beings. Of course, I don’t mean gods.
Alter Ego:
Of course not; but something rather similar.
Adam:
Exactly. Believe me, I don’t suggest this from personal vanity.
Alter Ego:
Nor I. Simply out of interest for humanity.
Adam:
That’s it. So that they may have someone to pray to.
Alter Ego:
And so that they may be the children of God. But they’ll soon be coming here now; we’d better be getting dressed.
Adam:
Here in this cave. And then we’ll appear at its mouth———
Alter Ego:
—hand in hand. Come along, I’ll help you into your clothes.
Adam:
And I’ll help you.
[They go to the cave.
Alter Ego:
It smells rather funny here.
[They go in.
Adam (inside):
There’s someone here!
Alter Ego (inside):
Some sort of people.
Adam (inside):
They’re not people.
[They both retreat quickly, obviously puzzled.
Alter Ego:
I saw something dreadful in there. It was about seven times as big as a man.
Adam:
There were swarms of them round the fire. I saw seven heads; it’s ghastly.
Alter Ego:
Did you see how its eyes gleamed?
Adam (calls):
Hi, you monster, whatever are you, come out!
Alter Ego:
Come out, giant! Out, you monstrosity!
Adam:
Did you hear? Something’s moving!
Alter Ego:
Here it comes rushing out.—Come out into the light, Behemoth!
[A ragged urchin appears.
Adam:
That’s not what I saw! What are you?
Alter Ego:
Have you lost your tongue? What’s your name?
[A second child appears.
Adam:
And what’s this?
[A third child appears.
Alter Ego:
Another piece?
[A fourth child appears.
Adam:
That’s enough, thank you!
[A fifth child appears.
Alter Ego:
This really does beat all!
[A sixth child appears.
Adam:
Hullo! Anyone else in there?
A Voice:
Me, Guv’nor!
Adam:
Who’s me?
Voice:
Oddly-Come-Short. (Oddly-Come-Short comes out of the cave.) Mornin’, sir. Now, kids, wipe your noses and say good-morning to the gentlemen.
Adam:
Is that you, Oddly-Come-Short? You’re still alive? What do you do?
Oddly-Come-Short:
What should I do, your Lordship? Scrape along somehow.
Alter Ego:
And what’s all this?
Oddly-Come-Short:
Brats, sir.
Adam:
All these children? Where did you get them from? And where’s your wife?
Oddly-Come-Short:
Saving your presence, sir, a poor man always does have young ’uns, doesn’t he?
Adam:
But we didn’t create you a wife!
Oddly-Come-Short:
Why, sir, no one creates a poor man. Of course not, sir. He just is.
Alter Ego:
And where did you get a wife from? You must have had one, you know, to get all these bits of children.
Oddly-Come-Short:
Well, these children get a bit of something, and I get a bit of something, too.
Alter Ego:
Poor fellow. He’s got a screw loose.
Oddly-Come-Short:
Right, sir; just let me see after these little Oddly-Come-Shorts. (A few quick slaps.) Now, you take him and go for potatoes. You mind him and you pull some grass for the goat. You go and look for mushrooms, and you go and find some sticks. Off with you now!
[The children scamper off, shrieking wildly.
Adam:
Oddly-Come-Short, how did you come by all these children?
Oddly-Come-Short:
I dunno, sir. It’s that dark in there.
Alter Ego:
Where? Here in this hole? Do you all live in there?
Oddly-Come-Short:
Yes, sir. They won’t have us there and they won’t have us there. (Pointing to the two cities.)
Adam:
And how do you make a living, really?
Oddly-Come-Short:
Just whatever comes along, sir. Oddly-Come-Short ’ll work at anything. Cart manure, sir? Chop wood, sir? Skin a dead dog, sir? Right sir.
Adam:
No, we don’t need anything. Or, wait a minute, there are some people coming here from the two cities; do you understand? You might tidy up a bit here.
Oddly-Come-Short:
Right, sir, I’ll clear up.
Alter Ego:
And meantime we’ll retire into the cave.
Adam:
And then we’ll appear on the threshold———
Alter Ego:
And at that moment, Oddly-Come-Short, you light up a Bengal light in front of us. It’s only fireworks.
Oddly-Come-Short:
That’ll be fine, sir.
Alter Ego:
Yes, it will. Take our luggage into the cave.
Oddly-Come-Short:
Yessir.
[He picks up the two suitcases and carries them into the cave.
Adam:
How awful! What earthly use are he and his brats?
Alter Ego:
None. They don’t belong to the work of creation at all.
Oddly-Come-Short (returning from the cave):
They’re in there now, sir.
Alter Ego:
Good. As soon as the people begin to come, off with you into the cave. Understand?—Come along, Adam.
[They both go into the cave.
Oddly-Come-Short (grabs his broom):
Tidy up, sweep up, fetch and carry, off with you! Oddly-Come-Short has always got something to do! (Scratches himself.) If only there weren’t so many fleas here!—Hullo, here they come. Off with you, Oddly-Come-Short! (He creeps into the cave.)
[The Adamites come striding in on the right.
First Man (Orator):
It is time.
Second man (Scientist):
Where are they?
[Enter the AE’s on the left.
1st AE:
It is time.
2nd AE:
Here we are.
The Adamites:
Hail, comrades!
All the AE’s:
Hail!
Orator:
Are you all there?
1st AE:
All. Let us begin.
Orator:
Good. (He mounts the raised platform.) Revolutionary greetings to you all. Hail!
All:
Hail!
Orator:
Comrades! Delegates! The question before you is whether this historic meeting is to be inaugurated by the usual formalities, such as the examination of plenary powers, election of chairman, and so on.
Adamites:
It’s not necessary.
All the AE’s:
Let’s begin.
Orator:
I agree with you. Comrades, we have not come here to debate. We have come to create a new world. Everything is settled. It merely remains to act.
1st AE:
I move that all frontiers be abolished; that our two liberated nations unite; that everything which divides them be swept away.
All:
Carried!
2nd Man (Scientist):
I move that Adam, commonly known as the Creator, be deposed; that there be no creator; that the legend of creation be pronounced a foolish myth; that it be voted and officially declared that the world came into existence by natural laws.
All:
Carried!
2nd AE:
I further move that Alter Ego, who gives himself out as creator, be suspended; that he be deprived of all dignities and rights; that he be banished beyond the frontier.
Orator:
One practical remark: In view of the fact that all frontiers have been abolished, it will not be possible to exile anyone beyond the frontier.
1st AE:
Arrest him!
3rd AE:
Hang him!
2nd AE:
Imprison him!
Orator:
It is moved that the former creator be imprisoned.
All:
Carried!
Orator:
In this solemn moment the old regime is abolished. Erect the tablet.
[They set up a large blackboard with the rough notice: Here the Work of Creation Was Denied.
Orator:
This is a provisional tablet. Later we will erect an eternal one.
Scientist (solemnly):
The Age of Reason is hereby inaugurated. Reason shall eradicate superstition. Reason shall eradicate force. Reason will eradicate everything.
3rd Man (Philosopher):
I move that by a solemn, inviolable, and mighty oath eternal peace be proclaimed, together with the union of all ideas and opinions.
All:
Carried!
Orator:
Do you swear?
All:
We swear!
A Voice in the Cave:
Oddly-Come-Short, light up!
[At this moment a Bengal light goes off in the cave and Adam and Alter Ego appear, both in splendid apparel and holding each other by the hand.
Orator:
What do you want? You were not summoned to appear.
Adam:
Peace be with you.
1st AE:
Don’t interrupt, please! Kindly move on!
Scientist:
You’ve no business talking here!
Alter Ego:
We bring you eternal peace!
2nd AE:
Chuck them out! Out with them!
[Uproar.
Orator:
Citizen Adam and Citizen Alter Ego, I announce to you that the Executive Committee of Delegates of both Halves of the World has deposed you both and has declared your work of creation, together with your claims, titles, and offices, as abolished, annulled, and invalid. Have you any remark to make?
Adam (comes excitedly out of the cave):
Yes! You can do what you like to me; you can scourge me or crucify me; but you must not deny that I created you!
Scientist:
That is a superstition.
1st AE:
We have just voted the contrary.
Adam:
Truth cannot be decided by vote!
2nd AE:
Liar! The truth is what is decided by vote. An absolute majority can make anything into truth!
Alter Ego (stepping to the front):
Listen to me. I bear witness that Adam created the world.
Philosopher:
That is a lie!
Alter Ego:
Then who did create it?
Philosopher:
No one. I am descended from a monkey.
All:
So are we! So are we!
Orator:
Silence! Citizen Adam, do you persist in your assertion that you created the world?
Adam:
I created you.
Orator:
I take you at your word. Why did you do it? Who asked you to? If you did create the world, we shall be forced to call you to account for it. I ask you a second time: Are you the Creator of the World?
Adam:
Yes, I am.
Orator:
Then I lodge a complaint against you in the presence of the delegates of the whole world for having taken it upon yourself to perpetrate the crime of creation. Why didn’t you create better? Why didn’t you give us four legs? Why didn’t you cover us with fur? Why haven’t we wings or fins? Why are we mortal? Why must we work? How can you justify this shameful and unheard-of negligence? Citizen Adam, I ask you for the third and last time, Do you confess to creating the world?
Adam:
No! No! No!
[Shouts and laughter.
Orator:
Then the matter is settled. You can go. (Adam staggers to one side.) Citizen Alter Ego, I ask you. Did you create the world?
Alter Ego:
Yes, part of it.
1st AE:
Why didn’t you create us better? Why aren’t we made of metal? Why aren’t we as perfect as machines?
Alter Ego:
It’s too good for you, as it is.
Orator:
Have you anything to bring forward as an extenuating circumstance?
Alter Ego:
Yes. I’m sorry I created you.
Orator:
Good. You can go for the present.
Alter Ego:
I retire with expressions of profoundest disgust.
[He joins Adam. They both remain standing near the wings.
Orator:
You shall answer for that later.—Further proposals?
4th Man (formerly Poet):
That all power to create and right to create pass to the sovereign and free people.
All:
Carried!
4th AE:
That in future the office of creation be placed in the charge of an elected Parliament which will have its seat at the future capital city of the world.
All:
Carried!
Poet:
Of course, with the proviso that this capital city be our city.
4th AE:
On the contrary! With the proviso that it be our city!
Philosopher:
Listen! (Shout from the Adamites.) Let me speak!
3rd AE:
Let me speak!
Scientist:
Let me speak!
Poet:
Silence! Either it’s going to be our city or it’s not going to exist at all!
3rd AE:
You’re trying to destroy our unity!
[Uproar.
Adam (coming forward):
Hear us, we bring you peace.
Orator:
Don’t you put your oar in!
1st AE:
We shan’t speak to you!
Poet:
Oh you won’t, won’t you? Well, we shan’t speak to you!
2nd AE:
And we shan’t speak to you! Let’s go home!
[Threatening shouts.
Orator:
Silence! (The noise dies down.) Two motions have been proposed; before I put them to the vote———
[Red Messenger—perhaps formerly Romanticist—hurries in.
Red Messenger:
Revolutionary greetings to you, citizens!
Orator:
Citizen, don’t interrupt the meeting.
Red Messenger:
Silence! Citizens, the Executive Committee of the Delegates of Both Halves of the World issues the following order. Firstly———
Orator:
What are you talking about? We are the Executive Committee!
Red Messenger:
Chuck it! We are the Executive Committee.
Orator:
We were elected by the people.
Red Messenger:
Fat lot we care! We elected ourselves.
Orator:
You are not lawful delegates.
Red Messenger:
No, we are revolutionary delegates. We’re the delegates of our party.
Poet:
Chuck him out!
1st AE:
Arrest him!
[Uproar.
Red Messenger (shouting them all down):
Silence! The order runs as follows: Firstly, the Creators shall be abolished. The world will be created by us, beginning from the present.
Scientist:
No, that’s not right! By us!
2nd AE:
By us!
[Uproar.
Red Messenger:
That’s enough! We take over all responsibility for further creation. The old world has got to die out. The Executive Committee has taken over all rights of creation in the name of the minority. Long live the Revolution!
[Black Messenger rushes in.
Black Messenger:
Revolution! Revolution!
Orator:
What revolution? Who are you, anyway?
Black Messenger (quickly gets up on the platform):
Citizens, the Executive Committee of Delegates of Both Halves of the World orders———
Orator:
We are the Executive Committee!
Red Messenger:
We are the Executive Committee!
Black Messenger:
And we shall have you shot. (He pulls out two pistols and takes aim at the assembly.) It further declares that the existing Creators are turned out and will be disposed of according to the law. The Executive Committee has nominated me as creator. Anyone disagreeing with this will be shot. Well?
[Long pause.
Adam:
You blood-thirsty dog! You murderer!
Black Messenger:
Thanks! You’ve grasped the situation.
One of the Crowd:
This world is the devil’s work! God has cursed it. He will turn it to ashes and make it a desert!
Red Messenger:
Nonsense! We’ll make it a desert!
Poet (to the AE’s):
We’ll smash it up for you!
1st AE:
We’ll smash it up for you!
Black Messenger:
Silence Gentlemen, is there anyone here who doesn’t want to smash up the world?
Red Messenger:
We want to save the world!
Black Messenger:
It’s the same thing. You all want to save the world. You all want to smash up the world. You annoy me with your shouting. The next man who speaks will be shot. (He cocks his pistol.) Now then! (Dead silence.)—Oh what a relief this silence is to my nerves! You roaring, jumping apes, how beautiful the world would be without you! Only the stars would sound above the deserts, the sea would murmur, and so on. You snort like cattle. I forbid you to breathe! No one must breathe in the presence of the Dictator!
[Dead silence, upon which sound bells and distant shots.
Black Messenger:
Do you hear? They are hailing me with cannonades and peals of bells. Ave Cæsar!
Several Voices:
Long live the Dictator!
Voices behind the Scene:
Hee! Hee! Hee! Ha! ha! Hee! hee! hee!
[Two drunken men lurch onto the stage: one is an AE, the other the Hedonist.
Drunken AE:
There’s a lark, what? Hic. I said, why shouldn’t I walk on all fours? We can each do as we like, can’t we? And he said, “Finish me off!”
Hedonist:
Hee, hee! Isn’t that beautiful?
Drunken AE:
Boys, there’s a row on there. And I said to them, “Just give him what for! Just you cut off his nose!” ’Bye, boys! And over there it’s on fire too, and over there, too———
Hedonist:
Hee, hee! It’s burning fine!
Orator:
What’s that? Where is it burning?
The Adamites:
Our city is on fire!
All the AE’s:
Our city is on fire!
[They all turn round towards the two cities which are lit up with flames.
Red Messenger:
Our people have done this! Revolution!
One of the Crowd:
End of the World!
Voices:
Fire! Come and help put it out! Come and see what we can loot! Let’s clear out of this!
[The whole crowd hurries off, shouting.
Hedonist:
Beautiful! It’s all so beautiful!
Drunken AE:
Ha ha! Ha ha! Let’s go over there, it’ll be a lark!
[He drags out the Hedonist, singing.
Black Messenger:
I think that with that fire as a background I must look magnificent. Doesn’t it suit my style?
Alter Ego:
Who are you, madman?
Black Messenger (takes off his black mask; he is the Superman):
I! Oof! what a stench! I can’t bear humans, they make me feel quite ill. Pity a superman is always a bit neurasthenic. But I gave you a fine performance—what? I dominated the situation by the force of my contempt.
Adam:
Damn you, what do you want here?
Superman:
I? There’s only one thing I want, but it’s worth the price. (He jumps down and goes up to Adam.) Only one thing, Creator, only one great thing: to drive away . . . just for a moment . . . a second . . . my own boredom. (He flings his black cloak round him and goes out.)
[Blaze, peals of bells, and shots on the horizon.
Adam (reads):
That’s all that’s left.
Alter Ego:
Why did we take the trouble to create?
It was you began it, Adam. How d’you feel?
What do you say, Creator? Speak!
Adam:
I curse the creator’s power, the creator’s anguish!
Curses be on our work and on my hands!
Curses on man! Why did we work so hard
If in the end it’s all to be denied,
Spoiled and destroyed by that mad world-spoiler
Called man———
Alter Ego:
Ingratitude, destruction, war, confusion—
Adam:
The world which he’s deformed comes crushing down
About his ears in flame. Oh, what a penance
Creating is!
Alter Ego:
I fear them, Adam. We created them
In ecstasy and on our knees, that they
Might live and hand on life. . . . Where do they get
The destructive impulse which appears in them?
Adam:
I it was, I denied the world, destroyed it.
I know how it was done. I know how easy
It is to smash up and destroy the world.
Alter Ego:
How?
Adam:
It’s hidden in the ground from me myself
From you, from all—what would you do with it?
Let it stay buried all eternity.
Don’t speak of it! Or you’ll—you’ll want to———
Alter Ego:
Yes!
Adam:
Destroy the world again?
Alter Ego:
A moment, undo and abolish all
That we created once; exterminate;
Wipe them out as you wipe a scribbled slate.
Beat, beat again with great creative blows.
And rather give a hundred blows than one!
Adam:
To us through them! Oh to chastise them like
A father!
Alter Ego:
To take vengeance like a God!
Adam:
Erase them like an error!
Alter Ego:
Out like a debt!
Adam:
Wash them out like a stain!
Alter Ego:
Where is it? Where is that with which the shame
Of creation can be blotted from the earth?
Where, Adam, is your Cannon of Negation?
Adam:
No! I’ll have nothing more to do with it.
That frightful Cannon!
Alter Ego:
And let them do it, slowly, cruelly.
As only they know how, let them destroy
Themselves by war and misery, truths or hunger—
Where, Adam, where’s your Cannon?
Adam:
(Dejectedly.) You’re standing on it, Alter Ego.
Alter Ego (falls on his knees with a shout of triumph):
Here?
Adam:
O miserable people, how I loved you! Now I’ll do you the final service. I’ll put you out of your misery!
[The Oddly-Come-Short comes out of the cave scraping the last remains out of an iron pot with a spoon.
Alter Ego:
No, I’ll do it.
Adam:
Out of the way! I shall do it with a more sorely bleeding heart!
[He kneels on the ground and digs.
Oddly-Come-Short:
Shall I help, Guv’nor? Dreckly, sir.
Alter Ego:
Off with you, Oddly-Come-Short! (He strikes against a stone.) Aha, here it is! (He rolls away the stone.)
Adam:
Let me do it.
Alter Ego:
No, I will!
Oddly-Come-Short:
And I can give a hand!
Adam:
This is nothing to do with you. (He rises.) Alter Ego, is it decided?
Alter Ego (rising, too):
It is decided.
Adam:
The world shall be destroyed.
Alter Ego:
The world must be destroyed.
Adam:
That will complete the work of creation.
Alter Ego:
So be it.
Adam:
Stop a minute. Alter Ego, it’s a frightful thing to smash up the world. As soon as the Cannon of Negation thunders out, the sun is extinguished and the sky grows black; all living things fall to ashes, even the grass disappears, and every leaf is burnt up.
Alter Ego:
That’s all right; now stop preaching and get to business.
Adam:
Wait a bit; I only want to draw your attention to all the consequences. Darkness falls, and all living, breathing things turn to nothing.
Oddly-Come-Short:
My goats, too?
Adam:
Yes, Oddly-Come-Short, your goats, too. Nothing will be left.
Oddly-Come-Short:
Not even taties?
Adam:
Not even taties.
Oddly-Come-Short:
And what about my young ’uns?
Adam:
They won’t be any more.
Oddly-Come-Short:
And what about me?
Adam:
Don’t be frightened. You’ll pass away quite painlessly, and you’ll never be hungry or wretched any more.
Oddly-Come-Short:
But I don’t want to!
Alter Ego:
What don’t you want?
Oddly-Come-Short:
I don’t want to die. I want to stay alive.
Adam:
Poor devil, why should you want to stay alive?
Oddly-Come-Short:
Because I want to see better days. And I want to stay alive as long as I can!
Alter Ego:
It’s no good talking to you. So here goes, Adam.
Oddly-Come-Short:
You leave it alone! If you touch it, I’ll bash your head in with this saucepan!
Alter Ego:
What’s that, you good-for-nothing? I’ll give you a good thrashing!
Oddly-Come-Short:
All right, give me a thrashing then, but I’m not giving you the world! (He brandishes the saucepan aggressively.) Come off of it! Look out, Guv’nor! Clear out! (He rolls back the stone.) There! I’ll teach you to smash up the world, I will! This is my cannon, this here pot! And this is my world, all this! (He strikes a victorious attitude on the stone.) I won’t let you have it, see? You all want to smash up the world just for your own great ideas. Oddly-Come-Short ain’t got no great ideas; he only wants to be alive. So he just won’t give you the world. It’s good enough for him, anyway. (He whistles through his fingers.)
Alter Ego:
Chuck him out, Adam!
Adam:
All right . . . only . . . while he has that pot in his hand he’s stronger than we are!
Oddly-Come-Short:
Because all we got to live on’s in this pot! Come along now, kiddies!
[Oddly-Come-Short’s children come rushing in from all sides: the first with a bundle of sticks, the second with its arms full of grass, others with a fish, baskets, and bundles—the fifth child with the sixth riding piggy-back. They all sit down on the stone.
Oddly-Come-Short:
Now we’re all here. The poor man’s pot is enough for the lot.
Alter Ego:
Who are you saying that to, you old scamp?
Oddly-Come-Short:
A couple of fellows as nobody wants nowhere. Better come and move in here.
Adam:
What d’you mean? Us? Where?
Oddly-Come-Short:
You two. If we squeeze up a bit there’ll be room enough in that there hole.
Adam:
Oddly-Come-Short . . . you . . . you’ll take us in?
Oddly-Come-Short:
Where else’d you go to? And if I can scrape together enough for eight—if you count the goat—well, as for you two sort of gods, we’ll manage something for you.
Curtain